Not edited AT ALL… Too excited to edit.
I know it hasn’t been any time at all since my last HRT update just a few days in fact, but it’s happening. It’s really happening. It’s 10am and I’m sitting here with a glass of wine (DON’T JUDGE ME!!! Remember I’m night shift so it’s 10pm for me) and starting to think about bed. But I’m so excited about something I just had to share and bubble. <3
Just to give a recap of the transition so far:
- It’s been probably about a year and a half since I said to myself “I might be trans.”
- It’s been about 7 months since I accepted that I was a Transgender Person.
- It’s been a little less than 6 months since I came out to my husband
- He started calling me “she” immediately.
- It’s been a little over 4 months since I came out to Friends and Family
- Most of them very quickly started using she/her or avoiding gendered words.
- It’s been a little less than 4 months since I started growing my hair out
- Part of this is also getting it professionally styled (but always gender neutral ways)
- It’s been a little more than 2 months since I came out at work.
- It’s been about 2 months since I started wearing lip makeup.
- It’s been a little less than two months since I had to start wearing bobby pins and barrettes to keep the hair out of my eyes.
- It’s been just over a month since I started Hormone Replacement Therapy
- It’s been about a month since I was first referred to as “she” in person by an acquaintance.
- He did know I was transitioning, and looked very embarrassed.
- He’s avoided gender words ever since.
- It’s been a little over two weeks since I was first gendered as a woman by someone who didn’t know me at all.
- It has happened a couple of times since then
- It has only happened when I’ve been around other women with no men present.
- It has also never happened once someone saw my face.
- It never happened if they had already heard my voice.
- Once they: saw my face, saw my neck, or heard my voice, they looked embarrassed and/or apologized.
- It’s been a little less than two weeks since I was first referred to as “she” in a work e-mail.
- I’m still usually referred to as he/him at work still, except for people that work with me every day.
- 24 hours ago I got my first real woman’s hair style…
Things that haven’t been part of the transition yet:
- I still have and shave facial hair every day…
- I am still wearing men’s clothing.
- I am not wearing any other makeup.
- I have not attempted to change my voice (but some say it has slightly)
- My Adam’s apple is plainly obvious
- I haven’t really changed in body shape yet.
Then, It happened…
Today, I went to the local UPS to pick up a package. Getting packages and deliveries as night-shift is a nightmare. It’s easier just to have it delivered to the distribution center and pick it up after work. I went alone. The woman behind the counter took a look at me made eye contact with me and asked me a very simple question.
Are you here to pick up a package, miss?
My jaw hit the floor. She saw my face… and still called me “miss.” I paused for a moment and said “ye… yes I am.” She instructed me to write my name on a clipboard and sit in a nearby room. I waited a couple of minutes… “Miss, what’s your address?” “…” I paused she couldn’t be talking to me. I looked up. She was looking straight at me. “What’s your address miss?” HOLY SHIT! She heard my voice and is still calling me miss! I walked up quickly, very embarrassed, and gave my address. It was not an empty room and everyone looked at me like “that’s a guy isn’t it?” She looked at the name I wrote which was the same name as on the package: “Jo.” Then she went to get my package (it was wine) and she asked for my ID… I handed over my driver’s licence waiting for her reaction… Of course I would be blown for sure… She looks at the license and sees:
Joseph (Last Name) DOB:11/17/1985
She didn’t appear to look shocked or amazed in anyway. “You can use the cart to take it out to your car if you wish.” I asked how heavy it was and she said “you should use the cart.” Now given that I am really small and not very muscular… She didn’t say miss again after seeing my ID. I expected that. Bah.
So I took the package out to my car and brought back in the cart. I saw her again as I brought the cart back in. I said “That was quite heavy, thanks for the advice.” She looked up at me, smiled, and said “No problem miss, have a nice day.” My jaw hit the floor again… I managed to stammer “Th-Thank you!”
When I turned on the car, there was a particular song on the satellite radio. 80s on 8 Channel… It perfectly described how I felt… It’s been in my head ever since.